Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I saw my favorite band last night. Amazing!
Rachael, Wes, Gagne, Bidwell, Laurel, and myself got tickets a little over a week ago for the Band of Horses show at Club Nokia, next to the Staples Center, in Los Angeles. Rachael and I were two of the first 40 people to try to get in the "pit" right in front of the stage, so we got wrist bands.
The show was amazing. Ben Bridwell came out wearing a cowboy hat, boots, and a western button-up. There set was perfect.
After the show I ran to the stage and got the set-list. We saw Soren and Allison Gerali there who had VIP wristbands. I gave Allison the set list to get signed by the band.
Hopefully I get it back.
They band said that they were in Los Angeles finishing their 3rd full length album entitled "Night Rainbow". They played a hand full of songs off this album and I cannot wait to hear it.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Today turned my world view around. It was the best day I remember having in a really long time, and for a lot of reasons. My mind and body both feel completely rested. I don't feel that I have a thing in the world to worry about.
Last night, friday, Rachael and I went to dinner in downtown Claremont called Aruffo's. It is a cute little Italian restaurant that does Italian right. Here is the link to the restaurants reviews on Yelp.com: http://www.yelp.com/biz/aruffos-italian-cuisine-claremont
The dinner and wine was amazing and I don't think we have been as close as we are now; it feels as though the two of us just started dating.
Rachael spent the night and when we woke up in the morning I made a pot of coffee. While the coffee was still brewing me and Rachael went to YumYum's Doughnuts to get breakfast for the "mates". When we got back we woke up Tim and Ashley and cuddled up in their bed and talked.
Tim and I have become a lot closer lately. I don't know what happened to us... but it was really refreshing. This is when the day kicked off.
Wes woke up and it was on like a WILDFIRE!!! The three of us guys cleaned most of the house. We turned on some good music and did some deep cleaning. There is something about cleaning that brings people together. I think it is because it feels like a new start. Over the past couple months a lot of dirt got built up in my life. It was today that I decided to put it behind me.
My parents came out around 6:30 p.m. and took me and Rachael to Bishimon Sushi Restaurant. We had an awesome conversation about marriage and what it means to have a healthy relationship. They are so wise. I am so glad they approve of Rachael.
My mom once said to Rachael, "If I looked up Noah's perfect woman in the Dictionary, your face would show up."
Thursday, November 5, 2009
I am taking a step away from myself and Rachael for a second. I'm telling you... I am trying to be so happy about what Rachael and I are going through, and I am. It breaks my heart however, when I read about situations like the one in the link above. Maine, a state that has seemingly always embraced the gay and lesbian communities, just voted to appeal their gay marriage law by a large margin.
I thought that the national perception of the gay marriage issue was progressing and becoming more inclusive. I don't understand why we are still fighting over this issue because to me it seams so black and white.
GAY PEOPLE WANT TO GET MARRIED. They want to enter into life-long relationships monogamous, yet we wont let it happen.
What about this issue is grey area?
Do people really think that the gay community is like the Church, setting out to evangelize and convert?
It saddens me and my heart goes out to the gay community. I want to say that "I support you, I love you, and keep your heads up and positive. Things will not this way forever. Things will slowly change. Continue being who you are, and people will eventually see clearly".
I have been rock climbing a lot lately. Last thursday I went with my friend Bailey because Keith was in class until 10 p.m. He is so good. I just like watching, especially his footwork and technique. I have twice the upper body strength that he does, but when your technique is like his, strength doesn't matter. He taught me quite a bit. When I first started climbing I could use my strength to solve the easy routes. Now that I am getting a little better, technique has to be learned. Last night Keith and I went out to the ARC and had a pretty rough session. We are both climbing at our limits and became frustrated fast.
We saw lines that, at a glance, we should be able to do. For whatever reason we were spent and were unable to solve many problems.
My hands are becoming like sand paper from all of the calluses. This is an exciting time however, because I can see improvement. I just need to break through my limit.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
It is funny really. When I have nothing to write about but wedding venues, rock climbing, and rain I am very consistent. When I have some deep personal issues that could use exploration however, I tend to retreat inward. I do not know what it is. Maybe it is that I feel more comfortable in my unclarity.
The truth is that I am broken. The people that I feel closest to are in a state of mourning during a point in my life that should be celebrated and joyous.
People have been uplifting me lately for my decisions in the past week or so. I know that I have made the good decisions, but somehow I am left disturbed and uneasy. It is depressing to me how the good decision in a moment presents itself as a harmful and "not nice" decision.
More than anything else, for those of you who know me, I try to be a good friend. I love my friends so much and I try to do good upon them as correctly as I can. Presently I feel helpless, invaluable, and insufficient as a friend. This is a negative thought. It is exaggeration. I try to carry the burden of the people around me, hoping that there might be some way I could make it easier for them. I feel strong at this point in my life.
I have conquered negativity mostly and I am continually getting better at choosing the positive position in all aspects of life. Where is the positive in these recent events however?
For those of you who know of the events I am referring to, I will tell you what the positive position is: (1) Life is not lost, and (2) Things are slowly, but surely, getting better.
Even recognizing this however, my heart and my stomach is constantly in knots. I have had trouble sleeping and when I wake up in the morning I feel tired and anxious. I have broken down and cried a lot lately in the most random of situations.
Where is my sanctuary?
My sanctuary has not been "The Bungalow" in a long time. I used to rush home, walk in the door, and smile as the weight of my days mystically lifted from my shoulders. Now I find excuse to spend my time elsewhere. I have been brainstorming about what the new "Bungalow" might be for me:
- Rachael Lunghi
- Nick Garcia
- Kristin Hershman
- Keith Savage
- Arcadia Rock Climbing Gym
- Ryan Adams
I miss my fiancé all the time. I always want to be with her. She is my best friend and she facilitates growth in me so well. She is a great listener and she provides me with deep comfort. Just the thought of sitting across from her silently and eating a meal in her presence gets me excited. I love driving with her. See... as I babble about her my thoughts float away from the tension in my household.
I guess I do have sanctuary.